What is Depression Like?
Earlier today I tweeted out this:
I received more than 100 responses from my fellow supporters ranging anywhere from the simple and straightforward “horrible” to more complex responses, each of which that describes the individual's own experience with depression in their own eyes. I composed a list of the first 50 responses I received to give those who don’t understand depression an idea of what it’s like to live with one of the world’s darkest and most misunderstood diseases:
“Feeling nothing.” (@LulaWitzescher)
“It means life is about enduring and nothing else.” (@domoreilly)
“Lying in bed and staring at the ceiling because I can’t even summon the energy to cry.” (@CharmedMagnolia)
“Knowing you’re not happy but having no reason for why.” (@RyanCleggthe1)
“it’s living in a body that fights to survive, with a mind that tries to die.” (@jessica_xo93)
“Like a constant battle with yourself to feel something..happiness, joy and sometimes you feel completely defeated.” (@KiraAnn93)
“An oppressing demon that cannot be exorcised.” (@ced_porter)
“Knowing I will never be worth any of the time anyone spends on me.” (@GelaDelgado)
“It’s like I’m stuck in a deep hole in the ground, able to see a bit of the sky, but I can’t climb out.” (@SirevGiio)
“Depression is a brick, and I am a window.” (@LongsworthAlana)
“A non stop empty feeling and a void that can never be filled. Its like you’re screaming but no one can hear you” (@RainbowDemi314)
“Like a trainwreck. Like someone is standing there , ripping your heart out” (@_shotthasheriff)
“It’s like being mired in quicksand and being expected to be able to just walk your way out, if you really wanted to.” (@Bsideguy)
“Just a big hole in my heart that nothing can fill” (@Idaho_Mormon)
“It’s like a locked four room wall you can’t escape” (@someoneslove12)
“Wanting to be isolated yet hating the isolation” (@Hannahbana0323)
“Drowning while everyone else is happily swimming” (@_little_bear__)
“painful” (@Sabrinahsbee)
“I sleep for hours and hours.” (@SarahPeas)
“hurting, feeling lonely but pushing myself away, includes no happiness, energy, overwhelmed for nothing, anxiety for what(?), nothing good.” (@cele_xte)
“A silent death that never ends.” (@AshleyBlueRain)
“I find it’s like grief very very strong grief!” (@crazyleafgirl)
“losing my motivation for everything and wanting so desperately to be happy and laughing yet knowing I can’t” (@spoocedandy)
“Depression is a deep darkness that wraps around your body, mind & heart; it refuses to let go & when U try 2 be free, it wraps even tighter.” (@HEnabled)
“Nothing can bring you energy or joy or reason to try anymore..sometimes not even music is enough to make you cry and feel something…” (@AngelicaDIMR)
“Feeling too much and nothing at the same time, drained of life! It’s like loosing control of a ship and forget how to use the alarm” (@sumsumwilson)
“Hopelessness” (@KestellDenise)
“It’s like drowing” (@ReySkywalker99)
“A nightmare that never ends” (@mtbouchard96)
“It’s like I’m trapped in a small, dark room alone and I couldn’t reach out to anyone for help, it’s just me against myself” (@shirayuki2195)
“Hopelessness, because everything is painful and overwhelming, but you’re too weak and numb to do anything about it.” (@hannahmhixon)
“hell, absolute hell” (@zepptraxx)
“An unfair symbiotic relationship” (@Hi_jinxs)
“Dementors from Harry Potter it’s soul sucking taking all happiness out of you like you will never be happy again” (@CrissAthePanic)
“A draining black space” (@JUNEKIMBARBIE)
“Helplessness,hopelessness,loneliness and never ending emptiness” (@pritikai_)
“Like a dense fog hovering over my mind. A constant battle to keep the light from fading.” (@SusanPeery1969)
“Like feeling there’s no need to go on..everything is pointless:school, homework, Saturdays, days-off, vacations, health..everything…” (@AngelicaDIMR)
“Feeling lost and depressed and not liking anything and feeling empty and wanting to die and feeling like I am a burden to everyone” (@Yucca_78)
“Horrible” (@YellowcardSCB)
“Depression is like a an invisible shadow that doesn’t leave you, not even in the dark.” (@hearteejams)
“Heart ache that grows exponentially, noise in my head that cannot be described at the highest volume, certainty it will never get better.” (@jimosterman12)
“So much a part of me now that if it wasn’t there I wouldn’t know what to do with myself.” (@DarthAlexander9)
“Feeling hopeless at finding anything that brings joy in life anymore.” (@KevinBRPG)
“lack of emotions and energy, Lack of trust, Inability to love and care” (@AlicjaTurlej)
“Life is painful, and there’s nothing good about it.” (@xzykuda)
“Living in a world of grey where everyone else sees colour.” (@talkingtoduck)
“Hell. It’s like I’m steady suffocating. Like a monster that won’t leave me alone.” (@Thegamer12349)
“I feel like I myself am the monster……” (@Yucca_78)
“Like hearing the world through cotton balls, seeing it through foggy glasses, and feeling it with a really crappy anesthesia.” (@Sacheverell_)
While many people reading these responses will believe this post is “depressing” (no pun intended), it shows the painful reality of one of the world’s largest epidemics. Depression is not glamorous, not beautiful, and not something that someone can “just get over”. It’s a painful hell that millions struggle with every single day.
